The 6 month wait

After our last appointment with our RE, Marcus and I had a big choice to make. Pay for an IUI without insurance coverage now? Or wait 6 months to get coverage in our open enrollment period before moving forward? 

We decided to wait it out. As much as I want to move forward right now, I know we need to wait so we’re not financially and emotionally devastated. We only saved up enough for one IUI, and as much as I would want it to work, what if it doesn’t? We would have an empty savings and be in a bad place knowing we couldn’t do anything else. So we’re waiting. And it sucks.

In the meantime, I’m starting acupuncture and trying to be as healthy as possible. We’re hoping we can make things happen on our own. We got pregnant once in our own. Our doctor said there isn’t any reason why we couldn’t because all of our tests and stats have come back normal. I’m trying to be optimistic. 

I’m also contemplating my career in urban education. This week I was punched in the face by a student. Last week this same student brought a knife to school and said it was “to hurt bad people.” I feel crazy even typing this! I have many students with high social emotional needs in my classroom, but this particular student has so much anger inside of him it scares me. Unfortunately I was the receiver of his anger on that particular day. I was talking with my RE about my job and she said the high level of stress I’m under could be affected me physically. 

I’m taking the summer to really think about my future in teaching. I can’t do what I did this year. I’m physically and emotionally drained. As much as I want to, I just can’t do it all anymore. I’m not going to make things right for these kids. I’m just putting a band aid on their problems that start at home. I need to start taking care of myself too.

Has anyone else felt like stress from their career was affecting them getting pregnant? Or has anyone switched from teaching into a new field? I always joke with my husband that I’m just going to work at LUSH or be a yoga instructor! But then we’re back to our health insurance dilemma!! Oh well, it’s fun to dream…,

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7 thoughts on “The 6 month wait

  1. I have been feeling similarly this year. Given I teach 8 year olds and none of them have punched me…I know the stress level effects me. I got screwed with a loaded classroom and since I’m not yet tenured, got my pink slip until the budget passes and they rehire us all…the thought has crossed my mind that I might not be that upset to give it up. All the best to you, especially in these last few weeks of school!

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    1. I’m in the same boat with you, I’m not tenured and there are rumors of lay offs this summer. Maybe that would be my sign to make a change because I don’t know if I would ever allow myself to leave teaching. Enjoy the last few weeks before summer! I started the countdown!

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  2. There are people at my old job that believe the stress of that job caused my miscarriage. I don’t know that it was really the issue, honestly, but I did change careers to part time work with a missions organization. Plus, I started working with the SPCA. I have to say, I haven’t felt this happy getting up every day. I think it’s important, not just in the getting pregnant phase, but also the raising child phase to do what you really feel called to do, to do something that really makes you get up in the morning every day, something you love to do. And taking the time to take care of yourself. Cause ultimately, I believe you will have kids. And they will pick up how to do life by the way you do it. That’s why I did an overhaul of my life this year. Sorry for the long post. I am glad you are taking the time to really look at where you feel led to go. You are awesome!

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    1. Thank you 😊 You always have great advice! That’s one thing about trying to have a child for so long, it really gives you time to think. I guess I have some time to figure out what’s next for me, whether I stay in teaching or find my next path. I may adopt your idea of doing one nice thing a month for myself too!

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  3. You and I should both get jobs and LUSH AND become yoga instructors. That life sounds much, much better. I haven’t entered my career yet as I’m only graduating next week. However, the last three years I have spent being a student attorney have caused an immense amount of stress, especially over the summer when I’m doing the job full time. If you have the ability to switch careers, or at least jobs, I would take it. Life is much too beautiful to be more stressed than necessary. I’m trying to remind myself that every day. I can imagine how dreadful waiting six months for your IUI treatment will be, but I’m hopeful that in those six months you guys are actively trying on your own, something shall work. I’m always thinking of you!

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    1. Thank you!! I agree, life is too short to be this stressed! I want to take everything I’m learning dealing with infertility and make it into something positive. I’ve thought about going back to school to be a family counselor but change is scary. Congrats on graduating!!!

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      1. Change is very scary but going through something like this, I feel like we can do anything! 😉 Best wishes on sorting it all out. & thank you for the congratulations!!

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