Besides our life returning back to normal, so has my uterus. I finally got my first cycle after pregnancy.
There was something freeing in deleting my ovia fertility app from my phone. No more counting cycle days. No more ovulation tests. No more temperature taking. No more days past ovulation. NO MORE!
But with the return of Aunt Flo, the app has returned too. There are other period trackers out there but honestly I like the information and functions of ovia. It works for me.
So I put in my data and then I saw the green dates highlighting my fertile window. My husband and I decided we would just live life without preventing pregnancy. We also aren’t planning on trying to conceive for a while if ever again. We’re moving forward under the guise of “If it happens, it happens. If it doesn’t, it doesn’t.”
My husband has recently started dropping hints that he wants our son to have a sibling. And I’m not going to lie to myself, so do I. But I don’t expect our unexplained infertility to dissapear. I’m scared where this desire will take us.
At this point I really don’t want to take fertility drugs ever again. It was an experience I’d rather not have again. But I don’t think we’ll be able to get pregnant on our own.
So why chart? I want to see what my body is doing on its own. Do I ovulate on my own? Are my cycles regular? That label of “unexplained infertility” still bothers me.
It’s empowering as a woman to understand your own body and that’s the perspective I’m coming from this time. Not trying to conceive.