17dpo…. BFN

CD 30. I was holding onto hope. My period is actually late. I ovulated and my husband was home to do the deed. There’s no way we missed it this cycle. 

My little balloon of hope was popped this morning. Another BFN. I should be used to seeing it at this point. But it still stings and hurts like hell every. single. time

I called my husband this morning to let him know. Last night we were so excited when we talked. This morning I could tell I was breaking his heart. He says he’s OK but we’re both really hurting. 

So now I wait for AF. Constantly waiting. And wondering what’s wrong with me. There’s absolutely no indication that AF is going to happen anytime soon. 5 more days of waiting then I have to go back into my RE to figure out what’s going on. 

I plan on taking the next cycle off to decompress. I’m meeting with my RE to plan our May IUI. And I guess we just go from there… 

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6 thoughts on “17dpo…. BFN

    1. Thanks. Sometimes you pray she doesn’t come, and then times like now that’s all I want so I can just move on! Infertility can make us feel just plain crazy….

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  1. My heart feels like it’s in a million little pieces. I’m still hopeful for you. Maybe it’s a false negative, maybe you’ll go to your RE and they’ll have the news you’re dreaming for. Those are the little things I myself am trying to hold on to. I’m keeping you in my heart, and hoping for some form of good news when you visit your RE. xo

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    1. Thank you. At this point I’m 99.9% sure it didn’t work this month but hopefully my RE can figure out what’s going on. These erratic cycles mess with my head!

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